It’s no news that the institution of marriage is ideally, a
life-long commitment. Marriage is a long-term union between a man and a woman.
And it’s no guesswork that such a relationship must be built on a strong
foundation for both parties to carry along well.
We can also agree that foundations in relationships rely on
the exchange of information — by the parties involved — over time.
As humans, it’s only natural that we rely heavily on
information as a determinant for our relationships.
This information will be conveyed by conversations. For
instance, the information that your spouse is allergic to peanuts is a product
of information disclosed during past conversations.
Hence, the importance of meaningful conversation between a
couple.
Some of the important conversation topics soon-to-be-married
couples must have before getting hitched are;
Couples Must Talk About Their Career Goals
What are your career goals? Where do you see yourself in
five years and ten years respectively? Whatever the answer is, it is important
that you let your partner know even before you get married.
Certainly not a one-off conversation, it is necessary that
couples begin early on during their dating period to spend enough time
discussing their individual career goals. Although this may seem trivial, being
abreast with your partner’s short term and long term career goals, helps you
align your career goals in the short and long term.
This alignment of goals will in turn aid in providing a
guideline for whether both of you are; compatible after all, willing to get
married or decide to go your different ways.
- They Must Discuss Their Personal Goals And Visions
Talking about personal goals and visions should not be
underestimated among couples planning to get married.
In discussing personal goals, both parties will be aware of
each other’s dreams, passions, and interests. And not just this, the couple may
then go-ahead to work around ways to support each other’s dreams, and goals. In
fact, couples may even realize how their goals
- Couples Must Discuss Children
Individuals hold various opinions on raising children. Some
might believe in disciplining by spanking, while others might be more inclined
to only speaking or scolding a child. Additionally, some individuals may not
even want children at all. Some individuals might want to bear only one child,
while others might want a house full of mini-thems.
The variety of choices when it comes to children must not be
underestimated by couples. Never ignore the subject matter of children with a
prospective spouse. As little as this topic might seem, this could destroy or
make a marriage.
Additionally, discussing in-depth on this subject of
children is the key to effectively communicating the opinions of both parties
regarding children. Focus on questions like: How many children do you want to
have? How do you two wish to raise your children? What disciplinary measures
would you put in place to correct their mistakes?
- Couples Must Discuss Their Personal Finances
Finances are never a joking matter in a marriage. Bills have
to be paid, responsibilities have to be met, children and wards have to be
catered for and all of these depend highly on the money. For this reason,
engaged couples must carry out extensive discussions on their individual
finances.
What is your net worth? How much do you earn? What is your
annual financial budget like? What loans are you still repaying? What financial
flaws do you have? These and many more must be discussed between a couple
looking to settle together.
- Couples Must Discuss Their Religion and Values
Although some may argue that this is unimportant,
understanding and knowing your potential spouse’s beliefs, value systems, and
religion, is a must.
Remember that humans are social beings who pair off with
humans of like minds. Hence, discuss what your individual religions are and how
you wish to practise them in your family. Are both parties willing to be
non-religious or would they maintain the same faith? No one but the couple can
answer these questions themselves.
Remember that this article is only suggesting subject areas
to base the discussions on and not imposing them. What’s more important is that
you talk to cover all grounds with your spouse-to-be before saying, “1 do”.
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