In every relationship no matter
how beautiful, there’s bound to be conflicts of interest between the two
parties involved.
With conflicting interests,
arguments occur. But arguments and misunderstandings can be properly managed
with the right amount of civility and objectivity from both parties involved.
To handle conflict maturely,
certain words and phrases must be avoided. This is because words are powerful;
leaving a lasting impression on the subconscious of our loved ones. It is
important therefore, to remain calm during arguments or during a misunderstanding
and carefully select the words we use.
For longer lasting relationships,
avoid using these seven phrases with your partner;
Shut Up
The phrase, ‘shut up’ tends to
fly around easily during arguments. Usually, in the heat of the moment,
blurting out this hurtful phrase is an attempt at imposing an end to the
discussion on your partner.
Asides being hurtful, ‘shutting
your partner up’ is highly disrespectful as it implies you have little regard
for their opinion and what they have to say at that moment.
Should you feel reluctant to
engage in an argument or discussion with your partner, simply suggest to them
politely that you’d rather have that conversation on a later time.
I Wish I Never Dated You
Saying these words or ‘i wish i
never married you’ to your partner begets serious repercussions even when said
‘harmlessly’.
Similarly, blurting out
comparisons between your partner and your ex for instance, is completely foul
and disrespectful. Never for instance, say things, “I wish you could be more
like [insert ex’s name]”.
You’re a Failure
Nobody deserves to be humiliated
because they do not meet your expectations for them least of all, your lover.
If you feel your partner is a failure, you probably have no business dating
them in the first place.
Of course, this doesn’t mean it’s
inappropriate to encourage your beau/belle to do better. In fact, being a force
of raw and uncut honesty and support system for your partner whenever they flop
is a blessing. But in doing so, being sympathetic, patient, and loving is sure
to drive your partner into doing better.
You’re an Idiot
Along with every other curse word
or phrase is a huge no, no. Should you feel frustrated, or hurt by your
partner, convey your feelings to them respectfully.
You’re Too Fat/Skinny
As ‘helpful’ as you may feel
uttering this to your partner, this is pure suicide. Bodyshaming isn’t
restricted to harsh or over-dramatic comments alone. Telling your partner they
are too fat or thin is a sure ticket to letting them know you do not appreciate
them just the way they are.
Truly depressing
If for medical reasons, you’re
concerned about your partner’s weight, book them an appointment with a medical
specialist and support them the best way you can.
I’m Leaving You
In whatever form aid, this phrase
should be avoided unless actually meant.
Avoid threatening or emotionally
blackmailing your partner with threats of divorce or break up. It’s not only a
sad attempt at getting their attention, but also a seed that when germinated,
could actually lead to an actual separation.
I’m Sorry But
Uttering this phrase to your
partner, negates your apology. By including ‘but’ in an apology, you’re
indirectly half-assing an apology to your partner.
This means that despite your
wrongdoings towards them, your actions are justifiable. Not a great move if you
plan on making your relationship work.
Sure these are not the only words
to avoid saying to your partner as there are a number of similarly abominable
words and phrases.
In learning how to accurately
communicate with your beau/belle, insist on treating them first with respect,
decency, and love no matter the situation.
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