All relationships have their
weaknesses and strong suits. Yet, what to expect from them might sometimes
become vague – especially if one just embarked on a dating spree or plunged
into any serious romantic escapade.
Although one common practice is
to compare one’s relationship with that of one’s parents or other rare but
relatable prototypes, we often find that relationships built on the basis of
such delusional assumptions mostly come to betray the expectations that birthed
them.
While it might be true that
overly idealistic and unrealistic relationship expectations might be
detrimental, some fundamental values like the following might prove to be the
only way of telling if you’re in with the right person.
Affection
From chivalry and other romantic
gestures typical of medieval marriages to mutually accepted verbal behaviours,
asking for affection is one of the most fundamental demands to make of a
promising relationship.
Affection can ideally be thought
of as a sort of thermometer with which to gauge your partner’s interest in the
union, although, the needed amount depends on what is comfortable for both
partners.
Intimacy
While many partners are often too
quick to think of sexual intercourse when intimacy is mentioned, it is
noteworthy that intimacy encompasses making love but goes beyond just that.
There’s also the trust factor that accompanies this.
Partners in a relationship should
expect a certain degree of honest openness, one that allows them to share memories;
personal details that no one else knows; and previously concealed secrets that
potentially makes them vulnerable without fear of being told on.
Respect
Mutual respect is another
essential relationship value that could either spell doom or bliss for both
partners. While both partners may not always bear identical opinions on topical
issues, each should be willing to hear each other out and consider the dynamics
from the other’s perspective.
Everyone likes to feel valued, to
be respected or, at least, get the impression that their abilities and opinion
count. If you don’t find this in your relationship, then there are lots of
questions you should ask.
Time
Irrespective of how busy partners
might be, finding time to share romantic moments and make memories with each
other counts a lot – especially since relationships are judged on the basis of
quality time spent together.
Although it is not uncommon for
the professional life of either or both partners to get in the way of their
intimacy, there shouldn’t be any sort of discomforting and unaddressed
imbalance between them in terms of the time devoted to the union.
Generosity
Either partner in a relationship
has the right to expect some degree of generosity, albeit, not so extravagant
that the other partner’s finances are unnecessarily put in the red.
The giving partner, in turn,
needn’t’ be told to gift the other or find it unnecessarily difficult to yield
to such material or financial demands. While expecting these things doesn’t
mean you’ll always get them, it does, however, mean that it’s okay to ask.
Communication
Lack of communication is one of
the leading causes of relationship failures across climes. No doubt, unsettling
situations would always crop up at one point or the other in the union, most of
which require the communicative approach.
There should be enough mutual
connection for both partners to exchange ideas and profer solutions to tackle
troubling issues. There should also be that touch of humorousness. If you find
that you can’t openly discuss your concerns with your partner, then there’s a
problem somewhere.
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